


Jet Black Hearts 1.01: Jessica Moore

by voleuse



Series: Jet Black Hearts [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-20
Updated: 2020-10-20
Packaged: 2021-03-08 20:55:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 625
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27112957
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/voleuse/pseuds/voleuse
Summary: She wishes Sam wouldn't hide from her.
Relationships: Jessica Moore/Sam Winchester
Series: Jet Black Hearts [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1979008
Comments: 2
Kudos: 17





	Jet Black Hearts 1.01: Jessica Moore

**Author's Note:**

> Set prior to the series pilot.

Sam didn't like talking about his family, which made for some awkward pauses at times. A long, telling silence after Jess told him about her first hunting trip with her dad. A glance out the window when she mentioned getting a birthday gift for her mom. An absent smile when she showed him a stupid text her cousin Jenna had sent her.

Then there was the wariness. How he'd never sit with his back to a door. How he'd twitch right before he woke from sleep. 

Sam never really played sports, but he went to some intense MMA trainer three times a week. (One time she'd joked that he must be having a secret affair with the guy; Sam's laugh was forced enough that she'd given him a look. He'd relented, but partway through his explanation about his father teaching him how to fight, he'd gotten tense enough that Jess gave him a break and changed the subject.)

Once in a while, Jess would go out for drinks with Becky and they would concoct ridiculous theories about what was up with Sam. Their best tale involved alien abductions and a Stepford town. That kind of storytelling was easier for Jess to think about than actual awful things that happened to kids while they were growing up. Sam would tell her when it was time, she knew.

It wasn't until they moved in together, though, that she really started to worry. The day Jess found a case of wicked-looking hunting knives hidden behind a stack of weird kitchen appliances her mom kept giving her for Christmas.

***

Lyra from "Race, Gender, and Sexuality in Contemporary Art" had asked to borrow Jess's breadmaker--something about an experiment with pumpkin rye. Jess half-remembered Sam stuffing it into the "random stuff" closet. After a forty-minute detour flipping through her old philosophy papers, she shoved over Sam's raggedy old duffel bags. The breadmaker was smaller than she remembered, but she figured Lyra would make do.

As she balanced a boxed mandoline back onto the spiralizer, Jess noticed a large leather case with rusty bindings. She tugged it farther out into the light--it was heavier than it looked, and the hinges creaked as she swung the case open. Unlike the exterior, the lining on the inside of the case looked plush, pristine, as if the contents were an extensive anniversary gift instead of a half-dozen blades, gleaming as if they'd been polished with love. Jess stared into the case for what could have been hours, not daring to touch the knives. Then she closed it and shoved it back behind a banker's box filled with Sam's thesis drafts. She considered asking him, _What the hell?_ But she never did. 

***

Sam was an avid cuddler, which Jess thought was adorable. When he finally fell asleep, though, he rolled away from her, curving as if guarding himself from something. She didn't mind--her boyfriend was a walking radiator sometimes--but it also meant that Sam was usually deep into a nightmare by the time she came out of her own sleep.

Sam didn't talk in his sleep, though he sometimes muttered--in Latin, she guessed from his pre-law classes. One night, though, he cried her name out as he jolted up from bed. He was panicked, staring up at the ceiling. She murmured his name and opened his arms to him. He lowered himself back into bed and she stroked his hair until his breathing slowed.

"I'm sorry I woke you," he said, finally. "I was just, it was," he stuttered, "I couldn't."

"It's okay, baby," Jess said. She pressed her lips against his temple. "You don't have to tell me."

His shoulders loosened, and he kissed her. She decided not to wonder.


End file.
